No, Really, I Am an American

I feel like my posts have been severely lacking. Let’s see if we can’t remedy this…

There has actually been some activity in my life as of late. Unfortunately for me, none of it is exciting or even good. Lots of things are changing in Osaka.

Darya left on Wednesday. In my head, she’s just on vacation or something of that nature. I’m not a fool, though. I know she’s gone, just like Kate and Natashia, and soon Jacob. I hate that I suck at the whole making friends thing. I think this may be the worst departure for me, however, as in sooth, she was the first friend I made in Japan. The whole living together thing will do that to you. I don’t know; we just clicked. It was cool. I’m starting to get a little bummed.

In other news, I must figure out living situation. Jacob is set to leave in February, which gives me a little less than three months to decide if I want to stay in the house, or if I want to move out on my own. There are pros and cons to lots of things; I’m not quite a Gilmore Girl or anything, but I do take these factors into consideration. I’ve been offered a place with Rob and Alex, which would be cool since I sincerely like the gents and get along with them…but there comes again the living with boys thing and potentially another visit from my parents. Although, I have thought about just not telling them the minor detail of my living situation. We’ll see how that goes.

Then there’s the job thing. I’ve finally hit the apathy feeling. It isn’t the teaching nor is it the students — it’s the company. I’m starting to care for the company less and less, and I’ve recently discovered an advertisement that appeals to me. However, I have only just put in my request of a contract evaluation. Rob and Alex advised to just go through the motions and see what happens from there. After all, jobs for English teachers in this country are a-plenty so I’m not want for employment oppotunities.

It’s just a matter of finding what’s right for me.

And isn’t that the name of the game lately. I’m not the only one playing. I find it amusing how Japan is more or less an excuse for recent graduates to put off their real lives for a while. On some level, I know that’s what I’m using it for; but more than that it was my desire to wander the desert. I don’t think I’ve become any better at making decisions, but I am trying. I’m trying lots of things.

I’m trying.

With the departure of so many faces, I’m starting to think I ought to take up some more hobbies. In the same publication of the job opportunity, there was a notice for free Japanese classes given by the Red Cross. Free is good. I can do free. I also need something to take the edge off my violence as the weather has become colder and Fight Club has been meeting less and less.

I hung out with Rob last night. He’s keeping me update with Veronica, and hanging out with him in general is just a good ol’ time for me. I am seriously liking this season SOOO much more than last season. The show has saved itself in my eyes. I don’t know what it was about last season that just didn’t do it for me, but it was enough for me to decide purchasing of such is probably unlikely. Although, last season did contain an appearance of The Master Joss Whedon…and had a sort of Cordelia/Willow reunion.

I am about to admit something that brings me great shame. I’m losing my touch with the ‘Verse. I put it in my head to watch an episode and had a moment of discombobulation. I looked at the menu and thought, “Huh. I forgot that episode was on this disc.”

I’m so ashamed.

Hence, I have taken it upon myself to watch it all over again. Although, on the bright side, Jacob’s friend Jamie asked me a Serenity question that I didn’t even have to think about on our train ride to work yesterday. It kinda redeemed my episode slip. Then again, the question wasn’t that hard. Please. “When does Zoe tell Jayne, ‘You want to leave this room. Right now.’?”

I watched The Message tonight, and that was a dumb move considering my mood lately. Yeah, there was a tear. Literally. I freaking love this show. It still breaks my heart that there isn’t any more. It is by far the finest thing I have ever watched.

I got somewhere in my fic…sort of. There’s a page. That’s so much better than the nothing I had there before. It kills me that it’s such slow going. Hopefully, this upcoming trip home will inspire something in me.

Speaking of which, yeah, totally looking forward to the home thing. I’m formulating a list of things I WILL do whilst I’m home. Like drink Pepsi. Did you know that people in this country don’t know me by that name? It’s amuses me ‘cuz long ago Natasha scrawled it on my dictionary, the one I use at work, and once in a while a co-worker will read the name and I’ll look up all kinds of surprised that they know me by that monicker and realize that it’s ‘cuz it’s on my book.

I think I’m hitting this mood ‘cuz it’s getting close to the holidays and I haven’t made it home yet, all this coupled with the fact that people are up and leaving…it kinda makes ya reflect and stuff.

I think I just needed to get some of this out there. Mostly ‘cuz I feel like my blog has sucked as of late. There’s one other thing…but that’s for a different post.

As you were.